The New Stuff

Young Boy In Paris Digs Up Jar Of Fingers


Talk about getting the finger! Brace yourselves for a tale 30 years in the making. Ah....Gay Paree... the city of love, great wines, delectable food, impeccable fashion sense, and severed fingers?

That's just what one seven year old French boy found on “Monday when he was playing behind the gymnasium of his school in Chilly-Mazarin, just south of Paris, and noticed a jar poking out of the earth,” a police spokeswoman recounted to Reuters. Apparently – as all boys and poorly trained dogs will do – our little excavator began the time old tradition of digging. The spokeswoman also commented, “With time the jar must have risen to the surface and the fingers were found in well-preserved condition.”

Once the boy's father discovered his son's new found treasure, he phoned the local police department. After the finding created a local buzz, area media outlets made the story even more wide known. Now get this. Six degrees of separation later, Reuters reported that “police received a telephone a call from a person whose grandfather, a woodworker, used to live near the gymnasium and lost four of his fingers 30 years ago in a work accident. At the time, his fingers could not be surgically reattached so the carpenter put them in a jar full of alcohol and buried them near his home.”

Now here's where I question if this woodworker is brilliant or a moron. Did he loose them all at once or was this simply a lack of learning between each chopping incident? But then again, he couldn't exactly tie reminder yarn around his index finger. Let's take a look at what we know so far. The man was savvy enough to use a great preservation agent; alcohol... Yet, then decides to bury his new Halloween bauble. Where does that action come from?

According to the report, our buddy 6 digits has since moved from the area. Jeeze, take your fingers with you. Nobody moves without their buried appendage. I'm pretty sure that's a law in some states. Once the police track down the man, I will take solace in the fact that gloves shopping will be much easier but don't kid yourself... you'll make it up with Band-Aide expense.

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