The New Stuff

Where You At: Worldwide Penis Size Map


Still wondering where you stack up? Of course you are. It's pretty much ingrained in our male DNA. You know, the whole pride and competition thing. Plus, bigger is always better, right? Well, speculate no more as the wonderful folks over at TargetMap.com formulated quite the helpful, interactive map in gauging penis sizes worldwide. That's right — breaking the "members" down by country affiliation, see what's what, on average.

Not only will this aid in the aforementioned comparative process, but it will also award you with the coveted opportunity to pick on your less endowed circle of friends, unless, of course, they out-rank you. But hey, we hope not.

As speculated, the Asian counties don't really fare too well according to these calculations. I guess they buck the trend when it comes to which head has more capacity. Brains not brawn, I guess. But then again, they say it's not the size of the boat, but the motion in the ocean. Penned by a "light" male poet, of course.

Which brings me to yet another point — if, in fact, you are coming up to be a bit sub-par, I wouldn't let your lady get a hold of this informative chart. Could spell trouble in regards to your future accompaniment. Just trying to help you out there, fellas. But always remember, there is a pill for that — and a cream, and exercises. By any means necessary, right?

So stop staring downward towards your belly button and head on over to TargetMap, to be highly disappointed — or pleasantly surprised. But quite frankly, I don't want to know where you stack up.

Recently Published

a20fddb2cf964258b99310acbe3398cf-80fb17993f36ad19cc861b052d2603c8ba4956a7
»

Warren Buffett and Donald Trump get into a billionaires' brawl over tax returns

Is this how billionaires fight?  Warren Buffett, the revered ...

Samsung Galaxy Note 7 is classy
»

Forget Touch ID, you can unlock the Galaxy Note 7 with your eyes

Samsung just launched the latest addition to their smartphone lineup, ...

429d38cf607c43eca1d37aed5759eb8e-005436dfd1c56bdcc0ef7c64726643d7132a2e1a
»

Jimmy Fallon named as next Golden Globes host

BEVERLY HILLS, California — Jimmy Fallon has been tapped to ...

NFL_Snapchat_322-50bc2eda923f3c1498b52590c3a645e100a19724
»

The NFL — and football highlights — are coming to Snapchat Discover

Are you ready for some football (in Snapchat Discover)? Snapchat and ...

browniepan-7d5fe6899c1b9db3e416d8b9aaefcc537d7b9079
»

Restaurant revolutionizes the way brownies are sold

Not all brownies are created equal. There are many variables that ...

https---blueprint-api-production.s3.amazonaws.com-uploads-card-image-131488-AP_16181711733011
»

The Academy just took a huge step toward ending #OscarsSoWhite

LOS ANGELES — For all the grief the Academy of Motion Picture ...

G. Star Swain Sings
»

Tourist's national anthem performance astounds onlookers at Lincoln Memorial

[embedded content] Take note, would-be pop stars: this is how you ...

card-image-131157-FB_media
»

Baby pics > news hits: Facebook loves 'friends and family,' cools on media

Another day, another chapter in Facebook's love/hate relationship ...

Lady Gaga and 48 more celebs honor Orlando victims in video by Ryan Murphy
»

Lady Gaga and 48 more celebs honor Orlando victims in video by Ryan Murphy

[embedded content] Ryan Murphy can bring together star power like ...