The New Stuff

Amidst Lockout Dwyane Wade Gets Job Offer From KFC

With the NBA now joining the NFL in lockout status, players have been frantically searching for new means of employment (okay, maybe not quite). Many have, however, joked about searching for anther job while their million dollar contracts are on lock due to the recent debacle.

One such player, Miami Heat guard Dwyane Wade, immediately took to Twitter in asking if anyone was hiring. And what would he get several days later? A job offer from his former employer, KFC.

The Chicago native worked for The Colonel when he was a teenager, so the fast food chain's execs think they might have a shot at luring the NBA all-star.

What's the catch, you might ask. Well, KFC is urging Wade to work the drive-thru window for a day in exchange for a $250,000 donation (in Dwyane's name) to the company's Colonel's Scholars program.

All joking aside, KFC's General Manager John Cywinski had this letter drafted up and sent to Wade:

We couldn't help but notice your recent tweet about looking for a new line of work in light of the lockout. We're always looking for folks with precisely your qualifications initiative, teamwork and the ability to make buckets in a hurry.

We've always been proud to call you a former KFC employee and, it goes without saying we'd love to have you back on our team dishing out the World's Best Chicken, like you dish out assists on the court.

Our offer: Come serve as an honorary captain at a local KFC drive-thru window. And, while we can't match your most recent salary, we'll honor your KFC service by making a donation in your name to Colonel's Scholars, a charity providing young people with much needed college scholarships, if you accept. How's that for a slam dunk?

So let us know if you're ready to suit up for our squad (as you'll remember, we've got some pretty cool uniforms). Our original coach, the legendary Colonel Sanders, knew a thing or two about buckets. And who knows, if you make a KFC-team comeback, we might just share some of his secrets with you.

We'll keep your headset waiting.


John Cywinski

General Manager, KFC U.S.

Looks like Dwyane may have opened his mouth a little too much, too soon this time. Seeing as word of this has obviously gotten out and will seemingly force the hoopster to take KFC up on the charitable offer.

So what now, Wade? The ball's in your court.

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